It's been a been a year since I've posted and that probably speaks volumes about my levels of motivation in the latter portion of second year. I think, for me, second year will end up being my toughest year of the course. It was a year that required lots of private study, and if I'm honest with myself, I've always struggled to be enthusiastic about reading research papers and text books relentlessly over a long period. I'm very good at shutting myself away during exam time and doing long days of hard studying, but medicine isn't a degree you can cram for and I almost paid the price for trying to do so. As it stands, I did enough to get by and I made I've made it into third year, but once again I'm sat here feeling like I've not quite performed to my full potential and I'm motivated to do better.
Some highlights of second year included that post mortem I spoke about in my last post. It was obviously quite a humbling and raw experience, as it was my first exposure to a fresh corpse and I was acutely aware that the family of the deceased lady would be mourning her loss. However it was a privilege to see the procedure. In March I was also first on the scene of a road traffic accident. A teenage lad had been hit by a car and I was able to do some simple things to assess him and keep him safe until the ambulance arrived. It was the first time that I'd felt clinically useful and I was commended by a passing GP. Having that praise at a time when my motivation and confidence was low really picked me up and gave me the belief that I could be a good doctor one day. Away from medicine, another highlight of last year was being part of a successful campaign with the medics rugby team. We are one of the smallest medical schools in the country, but despite that we made it to the finals of a national medical schools trophy! If any prospective or new medical students are reading this, I would really recommend joining a medics sports team. Trust me, you don't have to be particularly talented to do so - anyone that knows me will vouch for that, but by joining a team you get the chance to form close friendships with colleagues from all years and some of the best teaching and advice you will receive at medical school will be from more experienced students. A particular lowlight of last year was the large amount of free time. In first year you have packed days of lectures and practicals, whereas second year is much more like a normal degree, with only 12 hours of supervised teaching some weeks. Given the vast breadth of the medical field, I found it very difficult to do self directed study. Some weeks I had no idea what I needed to be reading and to what level of depth. My Biology degree was conveniently broken up into concise modules, so it was much easier to do the private work, but I found studying overwhelming at times last year, because there really is so much to know. Another thing I struggled with was living alone. I have never been a person that is comfortable in my own company, but because of various personal factors I found myself living in my own flat 4 miles from campus. Whilst it was good for me to gain the ability to live alone, I did find it very lonely at times and it certainly affected my motivation. But as always, the days rolled by and summer came. I spent my summer punting on the river Cam in Cambridge. I did briefly think about sacking it all off and making that my permanent career, especially as I have a particular propensity to bullshit, which is a highly desirable trait as a punter. However, sat here now on this rainy autumnal day back in Stoke, I'm glad I'm not still pushing boat loads of tourists down a river for £10 an hour... And in all reality I'm so glad to be back. 3rd year is a breath of fresh air. We're finally on the wards, taking part in daily ward rounds and putting our clinical skills, such as taking blood and inserting cannulas, into practice. I finally feel like a doctor in training and I'm more certain than ever before that this is exactly what I want to do and exactly what I should be doing. After struggling to gain the required knowledge last year, I feel like I'm soaking up information like a sponge this year. Every single interaction with a doctor, nurse or patient is valuable and interesting. There's barely any time to breathe, let alone be bored. I'm on a cardiology block at the moment and that entails 9-5 days on the ward and several evenings spent in A&E, which again, is a highly stimulating environment. As much as we, as third years, can do very little to help patients, I've already found that doing simple things like taking histories and allowing a patient to vent their concerns, or doing a set of blood tests for an overstretched nurse can be hugely rewarding. I'm excited about being a doctor once again. I can't wait to gain new skills and gradually become more useful. It's also been a pleasure to work with passionate junior doctors. The media makes out that the NHS is in crisis and that doctors are disenfranchised and exhausted, but so far most of the juniors I've met have been highly enthusiastic about their jobs and about teaching us as the next generation. I've also seen some amazing care - at UHNM if you present to A&E with a suspected heart attack, within 3 hours you're likely to have been diagnosed and to have had cardiac stents put in place and you'll be well on your way to a full recovery. For the first time in a while I feel rejuvenated. I feel excited about my future career and I feel like I deserve to be here. Motivation ebbs and flows, but whatever challenges you're going through at the moment, stick with it. I can't wait for the year ahead.
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AuthorMy name is Stephan. I'm a 23 year old medical student. I like to travel, play the odd game of rugby and I'm very vocal on formula 1 fan forums (yes I am a bit of a sports nerd). Archives
April 2021
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